The World’s Worst Novel

So bad it doesn’t have a title.  Or an ending.  Or a middle.

Chapter One – Revised

 

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143 Responses to The World’s Worst Novel

  1. Pete Maravich says:

  2. xty says:

    So I’m guessing from the comments about not liking books with too many characters that if the next chapter began something like:

    Estelle put down the trashy novel she had just begun, and turned to Eliot to ask if he was really intent on going to the opera despite the storm …

  3. Pete Maravich says:

  4. Pete Maravich says:

    i was trying to find some excerpts from HST’s work, he could wander completely off topic and the side ramble was usually as interesting as the original thought. certain things come to mind, i’ll look around. are you making this up as you go?

  5. Pete Maravich says:

  6. Pete Maravich says:

  7. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    there are a few chapters in Genesis that introduce generation upon generation of new characters, and still the book is called the “Good Book”, and remains the most popular literary work in the world. so make sure to sample a much larger universe of opinion than just your closest and most loyal readers. 🙂

  8. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    remember this one 44?

    speaking of 44’s. i think Hunter was sporting a 44. much more impressive than Elvis’s pea shooter.

  9. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    Mr. Green has gone AWOL. 🙁

  10. EO says:

    OK, I didn’t actually watch 44’s post, but the still picture reminded me of the old bit from “The Man Show”. I used to describe it to my wife as “Simple, yet satisfying.”

  11. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    i’m not impressed EO. none of them are even skilled enough to do a flip. if i’m wrong it’s because i gave up after one minute. i am a product of fast food, and the 30 second sound bite, or is it byte.

  12. Pete Maravich says:

    i was trying to remember a short story that he wrote, it started off about local politics but he interjected something about trapping a critter that was giving him grief, it was hilarious. i have the book here somewhere, just not sure which one it was in, it was after “the great shark hunt”, i know that much. i will now go crazy until i find it.

  13. Pete Maravich says:

  14. Pete Maravich says:

    took me a minute to figure out the Mr Green comment, i thought you meant in your life, i’m only allowed to smell him these days. now i see that he has left the site, maybe xty unplugged him (yikes) or maybe he’s part of the plot, or maybe she’s harshing your buzz (she not feeling well), or maybe he lost his job, or maybe……

  15. Pete Maravich says:

  16. Pete Maravich says:

    EO, you just made my iu list.

  17. Pete Maravich says:

    Mr Green has apparently failed the drug test and said some regretful things in the past. Mr Green is currently in Rehab.

  18. Pete Maravich says:

  19. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    iu? WTF? did ya mean iggy? …

    ( Herr Grün)

  20. Pete Maravich says:

    (ignore user, from the swamp), i was just f’ing with him, and hope he’s not feeling grumpy. the Mr Green situation bothers me, he is an essential component of the site. i’m not familiar with the origin of the Herr Grun reference…fill me in.

  21. EO says:

    Ha!

    (you are right, all the emotes are gone!)

    xty probably has to reload something 😮

    Smile: Our New Emoticons Have Arrived

    I don’t see Herr Grun on the list. Does anybody know the keystrokes for it? Maybe it still works.

  22. EO says:

    Here you go

    colon mrgreen colon
    :mrgreen:

  23. EO says:

    Herr Grun is cuz DP talks kraut when he’s had a couple :/

  24. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    i am forever in your debt EO! wait, what’s a colon again? : mrgreen :

    well, it’s obvious that didn’t work.

  25. EO says:

    🙄

    this is my fave

    colon roll colon

  26. EO says:

    :mrgreen:

    take out those spaces

  27. EO says:

    I have a feeling that several of us are blogging while impaired at the moment

    🙄

  28. EO says:

    :/:

    testing

    oops nope

    😯

  29. EO says:

    colonmrgreencolon :mrgreen:
    colonrollcolon 🙄
    colonshockcolon 😯

    that’s all i need

  30. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    😳 i stand to be corrected. :mrgreen:

  31. Pete Maravich says:

    not me, i could be a designated driver or even drive a school bus, maybe even the space shuttle. let me get this straight: does Herr Grun=Mr Green, or booze, or both, or is it Woodpeckers generic catch all word, like forgetaboutit or something?

  32. EO says:

    massive thread kill
    sorry
    time for “deadliest catch” anyway…

  33. EO says:

    Herr Grun means Mr. Green in German. 🙄 🙂

  34. Pete Maravich says:

    OK thanks, did you just hit me with a colon roll?

  35. EO says:

    you had me on iu, lol

    first guy i ever met who didn’t appreciate “girls jumping on trampolines” !!

    oh, wait, that was DP. pardon moi

    no, maybe both. OK, not every post is a winner. I accept the verdict of the jury…

  36. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    Herr Grun don’t need no stinkin’ umlauts. :mrgreen:

  37. Pete Maravich says:

    now i’m wondering if xty has gotten a big head, based on the success of the novel and all the feedback comments, scored a lucrative advance and left the site in the dust, took the Mr Green emoticon and said “fuck it”.

  38. Pete Maravich says:

  39. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    i don’t know why, but posts always run over each other here. it would make more sense if everything would land in order. but don’t get me wrong Xty. i’m pretty sure it’s my problem. the delay comes from my end. the feds have been watching me for a long time. :mrgreen:

  40. EO says:

    No youtube, but here’s the tune for you, DP.

    Who’s Watching the Man

  41. EO says:

    :fuckit:

    It was worth a shot

  42. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    only a few songs short of 100. they will never catch me EO. eat dust, slime bags.

    :mrgreenoncrack:

  43. Dryocopus pileatus says:

  44. Pete Maravich says:

  45. Dryocopus pileatus says:

  46. Pete Maravich says:

  47. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    :mrgreen:

  48. Pete Maravich says:

  49. Dryocopus pileatus says:

    100

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